so i fixed it. all good now.

The car was in 4hi. But the ECU was thinking it was in 4LO. Getting horrible gas mileage. I was thinking it was my front diff actuator. Took that off, used a 9V battery to power the motor and it moved back and forth. Hit the center diff with a rubber mallet and no luck.

What ended up fixing my issue was unbolting the 3 12mm bolts out holding the actuator to the center diff about 1/4"-1/2" and sliding it out while my wife was cycling thru 4lo, 4hi. Viola.....that did the trick. The actuator finally moved around. I can now put the 4runner in 4lo, 4hi, or 2hi. The only issue was in 2hi, the green 4wd light was blinking along with the center diff light. But it truly was in 2hi now.

The next step I had to do was to realign the actuator gears. Took them out and set them how they are pictured in this thread.
DIY: Transfer Case Actuator Repair

I did have to do it about 2 times because if you are off by about 10 degrees, it wont work and you will have the flashing lights. In the end, put it all together and it works perfect now. switches really easily between 2hi 4hi 4lo. no weird shifting like some people reported.

Only issue i have now is that my center diff takes a while to engage if im rolling. But once i stop and put my truck in neutral, pops in really quick.

Anyways i hope this helps somebody, i know i was freaking out this whole week thinking i need a new actuator since they are $600+. Let me know if you have any questions.