Umm I still think it's the tires (and my newbiness) and not the 4Runner's mechanical components.
All factory 4Runner Sport Edition 4WD V8 with the sucky stock Donflop Grandtrek tires and that's it.
http://www.youtube.com/view_play_lis...1D2B42B7DF9F64
Locking the center diff even while 4Hi does help when driving around in that area.
So what could I have done better other than getting better tires (real ATs)?