I totally disagree, but to each their own. My neighbor has AWD and he has to park 4 streets down because he can't make it up to our street in most storms. We get to point and laugh at him 10 times a year usually.
FWD is not "safer" than AWD or 4WD in the snow. You said it's because 4WD/AWD allows you to go faster which is unsafe. I say, use common sense and don't drive too fast for the conditions. When you go slow, you have way more control with AWD/4WD. And front wheel drive (even with snow tires) is more dangerous because you don't have as much traction as 4x4 or AWD so you have more of a chance of winding up in that ditch.
I agree with you. the 4wd vs awd is just based on my experience. We all know that a real 4wd usually provides better traction than Awd, it is just that I have not experienced it first hand in normal city snow conditions. (off road is another story.)
Driving a safe speed is key, but I think the issue is that most of the time we base this speed on how much control we have while driving, and not on stopping distance. The 4wd lets you have more control while driving/turning (I certainly don't deny this), but it is hard to argue that more speed means longer braking distance.
At a low enough speed that you have full traction while accelerating/steering, I don't think there is going to be a different in control between 2 and 4wd. The difference is going to be that you can mainting that traction at a higher speed in 4wd.
I suppose having a selective 4wd is a good comprimize. Keep it in 2wd for the most part, to help prevent you from in advertantly going to fast, and use the 4wd for climbing hills or whenever you can't moce forward.
In theory, having a 4wd but driving at a speed appropriate for 2wd is ideal. That way, although you are not benfiting from the full time 4wd, it is there and engaged if you need it for sudden manouvers.
My comment on safety come from the drastically higher accident rate for 4wd vehicles in slippery conditions.