My very valueless $0.02.
Came from two 335i's. Was looking at a X3 or X5 (with the same turbo 6 motors).
I then pulled my head out of my ass. I got rid of the two 3's because they were coming off the warranty. I'd be in the same place a few years from now with the X (coming out of warranty and scrambling to find something else).
Power and handling: Phenomenal.
Reliability: Yeah, no.
2009: Needed walnut blasting real bad due to direct injections (known issue). Two injectors replaced (known issue). Fuel pump went out (known issue). Wastegates started to rattle before I got rid of it (known issue).
So, got rid of the 2009 and went to the 2011 (newer motor, "less problems then previous motor n55 vs n54). In 52k miles, battery died (bad cell; luck of the draw). Turbo charge pipe blew (known problem). Coolant reservoir blew (known problem) and finally, at the last set of miles I put on it, the water pump went out (electronic, known problem).
If you have to do, buy/lease, while it's covered under warranty, but prepare and don't have attachments to cut the car loose.
One main reason I went Toyota/4runner: The amount of people at my office that have 8+ year old 4runners and Tacoma's, still running strong with the usual statement "oh, all I do is gas, oil and tires."
And three other coworkers had 09-11 3 or 5 series with the turbo motors. All of us had the same problems. All of us around the same time started getting rid of our cars. None of us went BMW again.
I had a 2013 N54 335is for a bit. Great car with awesome low-end torque! I never owned it out of warranty, but I never had any issues with it. The N54, and the N55 which followed it, actually work quite well once BMW worked out all of the bugs.
The biggest issues with regards to the N54 were cooling (which BMW addressed in later model years and can be fixed quite easily with aftermarket kits) and oil blow-by in the engine (which can be mitigated with an aftermarket catch-can). Quite honestly the oil blow-by is an issue for many turbo engines, both gasoline and diesel, so it's not just unique to BMW.
BMW's reliability isn't actually too bad, especially when you consider the performance you're getting. Higher performance vehicles, by their nature, have less room for error and malfunction. A lot of people who have "problems" with these cars are often the ones using piggy-backs or ECU tunes to get huge boosts in horsepower, well beyond what the engine and drive line was actually designed for.
That said, Toyota vehicles have better reliability, hands down. Thinking of all the things I've done to my 4runner and how it has worked flawlessly, I would never risk treating a BMW in such a manner. And Toyota's resale value is much easier to live with; brand new, and even slightly used, BMW's plummet in value in the second you drive them off the lot.
In short: BMW's are great to buy used as a hobby/track car while Toyota's are great to buy new or used for your reliable DD.
Edit: In regards to the OP's post, I never saw much point in buying BMW's, or any European performance brand, for everyday use. You're paying a lot of $ for the cache and brand more than anything else. If you want a reliable and cost-efficient daily driver, Toyota, Honda, Chevy, Nissan, Subaru, Ford, and heck even Volvo have great SUV's and crossovers that fulfill that role. Now, if you want a 2nd or 3rd car for pure driver-enjoyment and hobby garage work, used BMW's are hard to beat.