Believe it or not, your mileage sounds right in line with your year model of V8 vehicle. You have the 2003 model which does NOT have the variable valve timing. Toyota did not put variable valve timing (VVT-i) on the V8 until the 2005 model. You do have the 5 speed tranny though. My '04 V6 model had the 4 speed tranny. I get 18/21 on vehicle's computer but only 16/19 in the real world.
Yeah, you could feather the h*ll out of the gas pedal but why would you buy such a big engine just to do that. Buy a Tacoma or Dodge Dakota with the 4 cylinder and a 5 or 6 speed manual tranny. You have a big ole engine and let's not forget that. It's Toyota's flagship "LARGE" engine for its large vehicle line. It's the big BOSS of its engines as it is used in the Tundra, Sequoia, Land Cruiser, Lexus LX models. Add this to the fact that you bought an all-wheel/4 wheel drive vehicle with "PROVEN" off road capability. The gear ratio is NOT set to give good fuel economy. The ratio is set to balance power, towing, low speed torque, and fuel economy all in one package. You're asking your V8 4Runner to forget about everything else it does pretty well and now concentrate on 25+ mpg fuel economy. It's not gonna happen my friend. Toyota NEVER promise us this with these SUV trucks. What they did promise was a well rounded vehicle with reliability, toughness, customer satisfaction, Toyota's excellent reputation etc...etc.
For example, the 5 spd tranny only gives one mpg more than the 4 spd used in the 1998-2002 4Runners. (18/22 for V6 2wd and 17/21 V6 4wd while the V8 get 16/19 as it is an all-wheel drive model only!
In short, with the 2003 V8 Toyota 4Runner non-variable timed engine, you will only get anywhere from 14-16 mpg in the city and 16-19 mpg at best on the highway. People with ratings higher that this either live on really flat land, a place where they do no stop-n-go traffic or a place where they can do a lot of coasting.
For example, I travel a 40 mile trip twice a month to an entertainment entity where I only get 18.5 hwy computer mpg (about 17 actual) going there (an slight uphill slope.....900 ft level to 1500 ft level). Now on the way back I get 22.5 hwy computer mpg (21 actual). I get these numbers in both 4wd and 2wd. These are the best and average for my vehicle. It's almost exactly what the window sticker stated.
I think some people are trying to expect too much from Toyota just because they do so well with mileage on their other vehicles. You have to realize that Toyota did their best to combine a good towing engine with fuel economy. If you need a people cruiser that gets excellent fuel mileage then Toyota and I would suggest you purchase the highly rated Sienna minivan. I apologize for the lengthy message but I am just telling the truth and most here know that. Your not going to get better than 19-23 hwy mpg from the V6 and/or V8. Toyota knows what the h*ll they are doing and they are doing it very WELL just ask Chrysler, Ford and GM.