When you say 5k lower, do you mean off msrp? I found a new one at a dealer in TN that dropped $5200 off msrp, but it doesn't have the xp package. It's a sr5p with 3rd row and Moonroof, 4x4, white on black for 36k +++
I mean off of what you were quoted- although now that I considered it a bit more, you likely wouldn't get a great deal with them anyway, because dealers tend to offer lower prices upfront, and the "haggling" usually only nets you a small savings if it's successful.
I'll tell you what helped me, aside from contacting 26 dealerships in 7 states.
1st, I used online resources to locate potential 4Rs. Truecar was pretty good at showing me not only what each dealer had in real life, but it exposed that many of the used models were in fact being shifted around several states, driven by salesmen, wracking up miles and only going up in price- used was a scam in my area, so I chose to go with new.
2nd, I emailed each dealer first, only resorting to telephone when the dealer was:
A) giving me a good price, out-the-door with TTL included
B) had good customer service, showed attention to detail, actually read my email etc.
C) willing to discuss a particular unit in more detail, ie options equipped that weren't shown online
3rd, I didn't start asking questions about the exact trim I ended up with. I asked about Pros, I asked about SR5s, I asked about Limiteds... by the time I was discussing my ORP, I had a better understanding of what the dealers were willing to sell all of the trim levels for. Oh, and I let the dealers know that I had been in contact with many other dealerships, and that I would be willing to travel to whoever gave me the 4R I wanted at the most sensible price... and that I would not price match, if they weren't going to play ball I would simply mark them off the list but if they gave me a great quote I would spend the time and gas to give them my money. I did in fact travel out of state, and ignored the cocky sales manager two miles from my house.
All in all, I got my ORP for just under $40k, after TT&L, doc fees, etc. It was a nightmare dealing with that dealer, and I never will again, but I did get the 4R I wanted for less than MSRP (I think it was about $6500 off).
I actually used a great deal of the "buying guide" on this forum, I think it's a sticky? But yeah, the links here led me down a rabbit hole that helped me out immensely, as this was my first dealer experience, let alone my first new vehicle. I've always bought used beaters from friends, family and local private sellers.