I have an 08 V6 as well...noticed a lot of the same issues you have at around 130K. They've progressively gotten worse and I've taken her off the road for a bit to recondition the suspension. Here's what I found during my tear-down:
1) The passenger lower ball joint was pretty much shot. The driver's was well on it's way, but the passenger one was by far a gonner.
2) LCA bushings were seized and dry. I hit them with some silicone lubricant for a while, but let's face it, that's just lipstick on a pig.
3) Both outer tie rods were shot. The inner ones still seemed fine. I could flick the outers around easily with my thumb.
4) My driver's side differential needle bearing was failing. I had TONS of play in my inner CV shaft where it went into the differential. That alone created some vibrations at certain speeds. It's a common failure point for those with lifts. Check the Tacoma forums for more details. THEIR bearings are going out during the warranty period. At least ours last a bit longer, although I'm not sure if that's a blessing or a curse.
5) The sway bar bushings were dried up
6) Sway bar links long past their useful life
I'm in the process of replacing it all. It's not out on the road yet as I'm still dealing with some CV issues (seems my replacement axles won't take the hub nut so I have to recondition my original axles) but everything I mentioned will cause you to feel odd things on the road. I'm sure the LCAs were bad (I had to cut them off), but I was amazed at the difference between the old and new outer tie rods. I could barely move the new ones, where the old ones were easy to move around. That alone can cause some funny behavior on the pavement. I decided to go OEM on everything except the needle bearing. I replaced that with the bushing from East Coast Gear Supply.
