I have my 5100's with stock coils set at 0 as well, no problem. I also have a 1" Daystar spacer in the front though and 2" in the rear.
I did the install myself without any prior experience. A couple observations.
Are you saying the 3 studs coming out of the top hat won't tighten up to upper strut housing in the UCA? See picture below of my stock components before lift.
The studs I thought were threaded all the way and the top hat should be on the underside of the UCA, the studs stick through the housing and the nuts should tighten up.
1. There is a bottom plate with the 5100's that catches the adjustable ring for setting the height. I initally had this upside down until I studied the diagram further. That could drastically change the extension of the rod I believe. I think that's how I came to double check the diagram on the 1st build up.
2. With the 5100's, I remember my stock coils didn't have to compress much at all on the bench and I was concerned they would have enough reach to seat in the top hat, but they did barely. Then when installed, the weight of the truck put some pre-load on everything fine.
The top hat holds the top rubber piece (isolator) that sets ontop of the coil spring, between top bushing and coil. I did find a picture of my shock before I took it off so you can see the top components. The 2nd picture shows the isoloator and top hat components.
Additionally, I believe their is a flat washer above the bushing between the bushing and the nut. The flat washer + bushing has clearance in the UCL opening, just provides good pressure from nut and doesn't allow the nut to sink into the bushing.
I am really wondering if he has the bottom plate of the 5100's upside down? If I recall, this sets the shock about 1" different than it should be.
I was looking for pictures from my install, but I don't have any of the front strut on the bench with the 5100's.
Hopefully my discriptions were accurate, just trying to help here. I have been in your place and was frantic when I ran into problems.
Best regards,
Doug