I'm far from an EE, but I've done my fair share of wiring (motorcycle mechanic for a few decades, those guys love their "farkles").
The Very over-simplified answer is that you only need a relay when the draw is greater than the wiring (or switch) can handle. Most of the time this is used to fight voltage drop... I'll use lights as an example. Every 1vdc drop is like losing 33% of the light output. If you ran the power from the battery inside to the switch and back to the lights, you'd need more expensive (and heavier) wire, run a switch that can handle a higher load (and will still fail earlier) AND have dimmer lights. But by using a relay, you can have the shortest run from battery to lights as possible and just trigger that relay with light wire and light duty switches.
In your application, if you're going to run those outlets as all Switched, it would make sense to have a big relay at the battery that's powered/triggered to only come on when the vehicle is running. The way you're designing it though, there's no reason for relays inside. You'll have short runs of wire, can use higher gauge (thicker) wire without issue and not have a problem. Even if you want to switch those outlets, 12v 20a spst or spdt switches are cheap and readily available (you'll be hard pressed to find something that will pull more than 10amps on a 12v circuit, I've never seen anything that would). Be careful about sizing your main fuse, feels like 100a is way too much for 40amps (max) of load.
Just a FWIW because I've been there and done that, 12v sockets suck. They are just an awful design where you have zero "positive connection", they simply wiggle loose while driving. If you're thinking on relying on one for something like a fridge, you're in for a bad day when you find it's been unplugged all day. Ditto if you're charging some battery source for use when parked... Having one 12v socket for the random whatever is fine, but you really ought to consider a better connector and just modify anything you own to fit that new connector. Consider an SAE 2-pin connector instead:
Amazon.com: Electop SAE Power Socket Sidewall Port, Weatherproof SAE Quick Connect Solar Panel Mount Universal Flush-Mountable Connector, 12AWG SAE Cable with 8 Screws for Solar Generator Battery Charger (2 Pack): Automotive
There are other options too, but none that are "pretty" like those flushmounts. If you want a locking connector and happen to be handy with a 3d printer, you'd be golden. 2-pin SAE connectors stay together well enough for off-road motorcycle use though (I run my heated vest off one), so they would be fine IN the 4R too.