As a few others are alluding to, how often do you go into 4wd?
When I got my 2000 limited, the mid 20 year old female I bought it from never used 4wd...took a couple weeks of shifting in and out to get it to go in and out smoothly....by that, I mean I would press the 4wd button and the indicator would blink for a long time before going solid, moving back and forth and driving while blinking is fine. Currently if you are locked in, you are in AWD and aren't hurting anything driving like that....so I suggest driving in 4hi and hitting the 4wd button to try and release it and give it a little time.
Again, your issue may be more than this, but this is the easy start people are pointing you towards, which you may already know but haven't outright called out on here.