ric
Banned
10.) Toyota Prius Owners
Typical Conversation: "You really should get rid of that regular car. You know I get 40 miles per gallon? And that's just around town! This car is the best thing that's ever happened to me. And I'm doing the world a favor. I don't pollute at all, and it's so quiet! The neighborhood's not noisy anymore. That's right, my Prius is quiet, and it's fighting off Global Warming. You're welcome."
9.) Subaru WRX Owners
Typical Conversation: "So the other night I'm out in the Scoobie, blasting down that road through the woods, and I hit this pile of leaves, hung the tail out real wide, then slapped it back in line with a little more throttle. I'm cruising along when this guy comes up behind me in a Porsche... Looks like he wants to race. So I back off, let him catch up, and we're goin' at it for the next mile or so when all of the sudden he backs off real fast. I'm thinkin 'Guess he learned his lesson' and then- bam. Reds & blues all over my back bumper. Dude must've called 'em, told 'em where I was... Sore loser."
8.) BMW E46 M3 Owners
Typical Conversation: "You see that loser out there in the lot with that S4? Pshh, whatever bro. His hair was all messed up too. Sorry I picked you up late, I was working on mine. What? Nah, not the car, bro. My hair. You crazy? I can't just go out without that gel! No man, you shut up! And put on a real shirt. Yeah, more tigers and sequins and skulls. Nah bro, you look stupid. Watch the door gettin' out. That's a high curb."
7.) Honda Civic Si Owners
Typical Conversation: "Yo, check it. You feel that? No? Hold up, lemme do it again. Now? That's that VTEC, dude! Yo how about these lights, man? I wired that up myself. Fresh as hell. Yeah, and I got those sweet new springs on there, dropped like, two inches. Hella flush. Tight. Rollin' on Roti 18s, man. You don't even know. See my wing out the rearview? Nah, that is the wing. It blocks the mirror, dude. That's legit imitation carbon fiber, son."
6.) Lifted Powerstroke Ford Truck Owners
Typical Conversation: "WOOO!!! I love me some blue oval! Forget them Government Motors pansies, buncha commies. This is a real 'Merican truck! And now that I got this lift kit on it, I can go out in the swamps and pull out those Mopar sissies. That'll show 'em."
5.) Old British Car Owners
Typical Conversation: "Ugh... Where's that wiring smoke coming from? Gonna have to go order another can... C'mon MGB, just turn over... What the- where'd all that oil come from?! And what's that wire hanging out from under the dash? Not again... You're so impatient! Your Corolla may be 'more reliable' but I'd rather be in a car without air conditioning in a car that doesn't run than something with no personality, I don't care how close your contractions are."
4.) Mid-Life Crisis Special Edition Corvette Owners
Typical Conversation: "Hey, you wanna ride in my 'Vette? No? What, is it the bald spot? Don't you know what this car is? It's the Indy 500 Pace Car edition! There were only 500 made! It's matching numbers! With factory air conditioning! So what if it's a horrible purple and gold combination, it'll be worth thousands in a few years, you just wait! And then you'll be bald too! And old! And no creepy older guys will ask you to ride in their 'Vettes! That'll show you..."
3.) Mazda Miata Owners
Typical Conversation: "Girls' car?! Hell no! It's the modern reinterpretation of the classic open-top sports car. But with Japanese reliability. And it's rear wheel drive. And it's great on the Autocross course! I know, it's small, but once I get those stiffer springs on there, it'll handle even better. It just feels like an extension of my body, you know? And it's not a chick car. Don't ever say that again."
2.) Volkswagen Owners
Typical Conversation: "Actually, Volkswagen fixed a lot of their reliability issues years ago. Yeah, it runs great! You really should go try one. And they're so fuel-efficient! Now that I've got that check engine light on the dash taken care of- oh, no. There wasn't actually anything wrong with the car, the mechanic said it just happens sometimes. But they really have gotten a lot better. I love my Volkswagen!"
1.) Saab Owners
Typical Conversation: "It's got decades of rally experience in it, and a turbo. And you really just can't beat Swedish engineering. Sure, I've spent more than an afternoon underneath it, but I like to think of those times as investments. I'm investing in my unique lifestyle. You don't see that many Saabs out there, but when you do, you know what it is. And then you see it disappear down the road, fast."
I thought it was funny
Typical Conversation: "You really should get rid of that regular car. You know I get 40 miles per gallon? And that's just around town! This car is the best thing that's ever happened to me. And I'm doing the world a favor. I don't pollute at all, and it's so quiet! The neighborhood's not noisy anymore. That's right, my Prius is quiet, and it's fighting off Global Warming. You're welcome."
9.) Subaru WRX Owners
Typical Conversation: "So the other night I'm out in the Scoobie, blasting down that road through the woods, and I hit this pile of leaves, hung the tail out real wide, then slapped it back in line with a little more throttle. I'm cruising along when this guy comes up behind me in a Porsche... Looks like he wants to race. So I back off, let him catch up, and we're goin' at it for the next mile or so when all of the sudden he backs off real fast. I'm thinkin 'Guess he learned his lesson' and then- bam. Reds & blues all over my back bumper. Dude must've called 'em, told 'em where I was... Sore loser."
8.) BMW E46 M3 Owners
Typical Conversation: "You see that loser out there in the lot with that S4? Pshh, whatever bro. His hair was all messed up too. Sorry I picked you up late, I was working on mine. What? Nah, not the car, bro. My hair. You crazy? I can't just go out without that gel! No man, you shut up! And put on a real shirt. Yeah, more tigers and sequins and skulls. Nah bro, you look stupid. Watch the door gettin' out. That's a high curb."
7.) Honda Civic Si Owners
Typical Conversation: "Yo, check it. You feel that? No? Hold up, lemme do it again. Now? That's that VTEC, dude! Yo how about these lights, man? I wired that up myself. Fresh as hell. Yeah, and I got those sweet new springs on there, dropped like, two inches. Hella flush. Tight. Rollin' on Roti 18s, man. You don't even know. See my wing out the rearview? Nah, that is the wing. It blocks the mirror, dude. That's legit imitation carbon fiber, son."
6.) Lifted Powerstroke Ford Truck Owners
Typical Conversation: "WOOO!!! I love me some blue oval! Forget them Government Motors pansies, buncha commies. This is a real 'Merican truck! And now that I got this lift kit on it, I can go out in the swamps and pull out those Mopar sissies. That'll show 'em."
5.) Old British Car Owners
Typical Conversation: "Ugh... Where's that wiring smoke coming from? Gonna have to go order another can... C'mon MGB, just turn over... What the- where'd all that oil come from?! And what's that wire hanging out from under the dash? Not again... You're so impatient! Your Corolla may be 'more reliable' but I'd rather be in a car without air conditioning in a car that doesn't run than something with no personality, I don't care how close your contractions are."
4.) Mid-Life Crisis Special Edition Corvette Owners
Typical Conversation: "Hey, you wanna ride in my 'Vette? No? What, is it the bald spot? Don't you know what this car is? It's the Indy 500 Pace Car edition! There were only 500 made! It's matching numbers! With factory air conditioning! So what if it's a horrible purple and gold combination, it'll be worth thousands in a few years, you just wait! And then you'll be bald too! And old! And no creepy older guys will ask you to ride in their 'Vettes! That'll show you..."
3.) Mazda Miata Owners
Typical Conversation: "Girls' car?! Hell no! It's the modern reinterpretation of the classic open-top sports car. But with Japanese reliability. And it's rear wheel drive. And it's great on the Autocross course! I know, it's small, but once I get those stiffer springs on there, it'll handle even better. It just feels like an extension of my body, you know? And it's not a chick car. Don't ever say that again."
2.) Volkswagen Owners
Typical Conversation: "Actually, Volkswagen fixed a lot of their reliability issues years ago. Yeah, it runs great! You really should go try one. And they're so fuel-efficient! Now that I've got that check engine light on the dash taken care of- oh, no. There wasn't actually anything wrong with the car, the mechanic said it just happens sometimes. But they really have gotten a lot better. I love my Volkswagen!"
1.) Saab Owners
Typical Conversation: "It's got decades of rally experience in it, and a turbo. And you really just can't beat Swedish engineering. Sure, I've spent more than an afternoon underneath it, but I like to think of those times as investments. I'm investing in my unique lifestyle. You don't see that many Saabs out there, but when you do, you know what it is. And then you see it disappear down the road, fast."
I thought it was funny
