So I'm set up pretty much exactly like you are. I have a 98 SR5 with about the same lift, 3".
I went with 33s as well, specifically 285/75/16. However, I bought aftermarket wheels with mine. I have no rubbing in the front, full lock or off-road, or anything. An I have about 1" clearance with the UCA. I didn't have to buy aftermarket UCAs and my alignment is dead on. The wheels I went with are 16x8.5" with a 4.5"BS, with -6mm offset. My wheels/tires stick out approx. 1/2" past the flares. I've been off-road a dozen times or so and never had a problem.
Although Brian may have hit his flares, I'm not sure if you would if you ran a 1" spacer on stock wheels. Our flares are different than his, and are closer to the body, and narrower. And they stop at the bumper, while theirs have a piece on the bumper. Another member that lives near me has the same lift, 33s, but drives a limited and rubs his flare.
I bought everything at Discounttiredirect.com. Since I ordered wheels and tires at the same time, they were delivered mounted and balanced and ready to throw on. Plus there is no tax or shipping. If you are ready to buy and let them know, they'll throw you a decent deal (I was buying tires for my wife's truck and basically got them free).
The top of the tire is level with the UCA...