turns out the Bi-xenon: 'MotoControl 9003/H4/HB2 harness doesn't work with the 3rd Gen 4runners that well, you can turn the high beams on but not off. i found this out when i installed it in the parking lot of TRS. I went back inside to talk to Matt the employee that I bought this harness from, he came out and looked at it and decided to that I should try the Morimoto Standalone Can-Bus. We hooked both up to each side and bam everything worked just fine, the headlights stayed on during low and high beam operation, and the H/L shield went up and down during the H/L changes
here's the link for the CAN-BUS Harness
Morimoto Standalone Can-Bus - Relay Harnesses from The Retrofit Source Inc